calligraphy pen (grey & black)

I’m currently cycling through feelings of abandonment in the evenings. I didn’t have the best upbringing and come from a single mom situation. As a latchkey kid one often gets abandoned more as there’s just one parent who’s out working. This means that single parent can be quite ignorant of how you’re doing at school, after school, etc, etc...

I believe it’s a good thing I’m feeling all this now, because I had stuffed most of it down. The only way out of these feelings of aloneness, abandonment, grief, and sadness is through. These states come and go and this is how they process. They are asking me to look at this abandonment story that I have and whether it’s actually true or not.

Because I still carry this story and identification today, I’m currently being challenged to let it go. What I see now is that I never actually got abandoned, and that my life situation was merely a result of my parents who identified with these feelings of abandonment. In that sense it’s pure ancestral karma. We all got abandoned because none of us ever really faced this story. And instead chose to be resentful at the parents and continued to unconsciously dabble in victimhood.

That’s it for now. I’ve actually never talked publicly about this, but I thought I should as I’m sure we all are faced to some degree with abandonment/neglect in our lives and it’s really good not to keep this for myself and just share this.