You made it! The kids made it home, the in-laws were tolerable, and there weren’t a ton of gifts that needed returning. Now that everyone is headed back to campus, it’s time to either let that old anxiety creep in or spend some time on the front end helping your college student develop a plan to be successful for the spring semester. January defines May. Let’s get started.

Figure Out the Money

Don’t be an ATM for your college student. Before they even pack the car or head to the airport, discuss how much you are giving them and when you’ll give it to them. Level set now to avoid the defensive position Sunday night when your son is blowing up your phone begging for spending money (or worse, paying off sports betting debt). I recommend putting money into the account 2x/month. Put it on them to create a budget which factors in their books, fun money and any other expenses. I also recommend a set limit for credit cards and regular (maybe monthly) checking on spending habits. Don’t wait till spring break or the end of the semester to have tough money conversations.

Organization

Money isn’t the only thing that needs to be figured out. Now we need to audit and organize everything else. Including clothing, car, computer, backpack, etc. This is not for you (the parents) to do. It’s for your college student to take care of. All you can do is nudge and encourage. Let’s make sure everything is reviewed, updated, and ready to go. While we’re at it, let’s pull up the calendar and start looking into the future to see when things will need to be re-updated. Get the oil change scheduled and dentist appointments nailed down. Make sure that any medication refills (or medication management appointments) are also scheduled with your student’s doctor. Help your student imagine every little thing they could set up ahead of the semester’s start. This is as much a tactical position as it is a psychological one. Having our lives organized reduces anxiety and increases predictability — ingredients for a better semester.

Plan the Work

But wait, there’s more! Organization is the broad category, but now we need to give every hour a home, so let’s talk about scheduling more in-depth. I recommend to every college student that they use the following strategy:

1. Download the university’s official academic calendar (it’s typically located on the registrar’s page).
2. Get all your syllabi.
3. Put all dates for tests, papers, office hours, etc., on your calendar.
4. For tests, count back from the test date one week and put scheduled study times (no longer than 90 min).
5. Do the same for papers. Break down writing the paper into reasonable and realistic chunks of time and put them on your calendar.

The overarching theme here is to put everything on the calendar, everything! Academic, social, medical, and parent visits. If your son or daughter is in Greek life, there are a ton of events that can be put on the calendar. Same with internships or study abroad — break down all the details so that you can see things from 10,000 feet. Predictability neutralizes anxiety.

Plan the Breaks

The semester is way too long without time off. The benefits of having some of this planned out are enormous. I encourage students to plan out whatever travel, trips home, and visits from friends they can nail down on the calendar. Even if these plans aren’t 100% confirmed, they can still block the time out, so there’s stuff to look forward to. Students have to have more than tests and papers on the horizon.

The Big Metric: GPA

If your college student’s GPA got beaten up a bit in the fall, it’s probably a good idea to identify a reasonable expectation for the spring. Talk to them about what they think is realistic based on the classes for the semester. Talk about it, but make it clear that there needs to be something concrete. Along with identifying a GPA, talk about specific strategies that will be used to support them. All colleges have student support and academic support options. The best time for your college student to get help is before they need it.

• Academic Problems and Skills
• Take our Mental Processing Test
• Find a therapist to help with academics

Start With the End in Mind

Part of that schedule should also have details that show their finals and the last few weeks of classes. The beginning of the semester is the best time to map out the end. Put details about studying for finals, having family in town, and even carving out an expectation for lots of social stuff. If they’re graduating, figure out details early in the semester, since things get crazy busy and expensive during graduation, and hotel rooms sell out.

Asking for Help

Besides connecting with academic support, it’s not a bad idea to find a counselor/life coach who can provide unbiased support. This professional can offer guidance to help navigate the psychological and academic messiness that semesters throw at students. I recommend finding someone who’s close to campus and is well-versed in young adult issues like anxiety, depression, and ADHD. Universities often have counseling centers on campus that provide individual counseling for about six sessions and then they refer to a community professional. They can also help with medication management, group counseling, and recovery groups.

Academic Problems and Skills Essential Reads

Final Bit of Advice

Encourage your college student to focus on process, not outcomes. With a bit of planning, your student’s semester will have highs and lows, but ultimately, they’ll finish the semester better than they started it. January defines May.

To find a therapist, visit the Psychology Today Therapy Directory.