Maisie Derlega/DAILY
Before we even talk about sex, let’s talk about zines.
A zine is typically an independently produced and distributed magazine. They often have a “do it yourself” punky look and are usually just folded printer paper with handwriting or the look of repeated xeroxing, but they can really take on any form. Because they’re not relying on traditional publishing methods, a zine can cover all kinds of topics that wouldn’t necessarily entice a risk-averse, money-minded publisher. For example, you might make [an index of…
Maisie Derlega/DAILY
Before we even talk about sex, let’s talk about zines.
A zine is typically an independently produced and distributed magazine. They often have a “do it yourself” punky look and are usually just folded printer paper with handwriting or the look of repeated xeroxing, but they can really take on any form. Because they’re not relying on traditional publishing methods, a zine can cover all kinds of topics that wouldn’t necessarily entice a risk-averse, money-minded publisher. For example, you might make an index of all your local Connecticut hardcore bands. Or you might expound on hippie parenting. Because you have full creative license, you can cover whatever topic matters to you and your community. You can even cover topics so niche that they don’t really matter to anyone else. Or, you can write about topics that are so crucial and so cared about, yet for some reason hated or abandoned or made secret by the greater society. The photocopier is your oyster.
This brings me to a zine that is famous in the world of transgender women and their lovers: “Fucking Trans Women.” Published in 2010, this zine walks the reader through the sexual possibilities of a transfeminine anatomy and romance. It even introduced some terminology, though the acts described were taking place long before anyone thought to cover them in a zine. “Fucking Trans Women” was never intended to be the end-all be-all guidebook, even if it does include specific instructions — before her death, author Mira Bellwether hoped for a follow-up second edition, as partially indicated by the label “Issue #0” on the zine’s cover. After her death, though, “Fucking Trans Women” remains the canonical text on the subject. How did a zine become the hegemonic sex Bible for a whole community?
First, let’s acknowledge the reasons why “Fucking Trans Women” came about. Trans women have been, and continue to be, underrepresented by the traditional publishing industry. Of course, there have been breakaway successful authors published under traditional imprints — “Detransition, Baby,” by Torrey Peters, for example — and some transfem authors published by indie publishers have done really well, too — like “Nevada” by Imogen Binnie — but overwhelmingly, trans women have had to create their own spaces for publication, spaces that are often fragile. Publishing runs on marketing, and while women may be a large consumer market, trans women specifically are not, and transphobia runs rampant in broader society.
The stigma is only more amplified when it comes to sex. Certainly, the stigma and tension around sex can sometimes help sales; arguably, the proliferation of sex manuals for cisgender women thrives on women having shame and anxiety around sex that must be researched and resolved. There is not the same deluge of sex guides for cisgender men, but that seems to be a product of their assumed comfort in sexual situations (and perhaps their lesser likelihood of picking up a book). That said, think of all the stigma and tension we already have about sex, let alone sex-related books, and imagine that amplified by transphobia. For trans readers, this is a lived reality. For context, I am not a trans woman, but I am nonbinary, and I’ve dated (and loved) trans women. Strangers might query about your genitals or your sex life. You might fear your partner’s reaction to your naked body. As your body changes, you might become less familiar with it. If only there was some kind of resource for navigating those experiences. Enter: “Fucking Trans Women!”
“Fucking Trans Women” was created to start the conversation around trans femme sexuality, and it was a smashing success. For 15 years, it has been facilitating trans women’s sexual exploration. It has also been facilitating a lot of learning for cisgender people who might rather read a zine than burden the trans people in their lives with invasive questions. Bellwether wrote it as an “instruction manual for (her) body” at the suggestion of a lover, and many trans women since have used the text as a starting place with cisgender partners. (I, myself, have been the oblivious partner in this situation, happy for a study guide.) For a zine, it is nearly textbook-sized, an 80-page “GIANT” edition as advertised by the cover.
All that said, it’s worth reflecting on “Fucking Trans Women”in light of its 15th anniversary. For one, there are the typical warnings about language: language about being trans is ever-changing, and some of the language used in “Fucking Trans Women”might not feel right for everyone. Your mileage may vary in regards to the content, too. Some of the sex acts described might not feel good, at all. Infamously, “Fucking Trans Women” coined the term “muffing” to describe insertion of the fingers or tongue into the inguinal canals, where one might tuck in their testes. For some trans women, this is a revelation, but for others, it’s downright uncomfortable. There’s also a lot of content that you won’t find in “Fucking Trans Women:”anal sex, t4t sex and BDSM were mostly left out of the conversation. Why? Because they were intended to be part of a future edition, alluded to at the end of Issue #0.
From the start, “Fucking Trans Women” was never meant to be a one-off, catch-all guide to having sex as a trans woman or with trans women. The final page describes “Fucking Trans Women”* *as an ongoing publication and invites readers to submit articles or volunteer their time towards design or distribution of the zine. Bellwether saw a future for the zine that included a Q&A section alongside a letters section. She knew that some of the most important topics were untouched by edition #0.
As she wrote in the edition, “Among these topics that are important, pressing, and extremely relevant are BDSM, race, different kinds of privilege, how bodily differences shape sexual experience, anal sex, gender play … the full list is extensive. About the time I hit 20 pages of singe-spaced mini-essays and articles and instructions I realized that if I tried to touch on all of the things I thought were most important, I would have a book on my hands, not a zine.”
On that same page, but in a different photocopied chunk of text, Bellwether wrote: “there wasn’t time or room to be comprehensive / and I wanted to save my favorite stuff for later issues.”
It’s unfortunate that we will never receive more of Bellwether’s wisdom. In losing her, the trans community lost a voice that guided so many. But I think we have a duty to abide by her guidance and to follow the path she laid out for us — especially in the trans community, but in the broader sex-having community, too. I don’t think Bellwether imagined herself as the definitive Emily Post or Anna Wintour of “Fucking Trans Women.” She knew she was just getting the conversation started, and invited us to continue talking.
“I want to invite you to help out by writing and drawing what you know and contributing to further issues,” Bellwether wrote. “I will do my best to keep conversation going and expanding.”
The pitfalls of “Fucking Trans Women” are the same as all sex writing: It is impossible to cover everything and to use language that empowers everyone. The point, though, is to imagine possibilities, so that people may uncover what pleases them and how to talk about it comfortably. As “Come As You Are” author Emily Nagoski puts it in her own sex guidebook, almost all questions about sex really boil down to one question: “Am I normal?” It feels like most questions about gender and sexuality come back to that, too. Sharing our experiences and hearing about the experiences of others, though, can remind us that we’re all pretty normal, in a sexy way.
I’ll leave you with a quote from the zine, and I want you to hear it as a call to action.
“‘Fucking Trans Women’ is basically a cookbook: a cookbook still in progress, created by you, your friends, and your lovers. The recipes are for good sex, tenderness, better communication, intense pleasure, hot fucking, sharing new ideas, and developing and sharing techniques. The more we all contribute the larger the cookbook grows, and if you don’t like the recipes you see there’s no pressure to use them.”
So, go out there! Have some good sex! Make a zine! Share with your community in the hope that you may all grow! As Bellwether wrote, “This is your zine. This is your conversation. Whatever your contribution is, it is important. It is necessary.”
Statement Correspondent Anna Whitney can be reached at annabw@umich.edu.