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The Onion
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God Horrified To Find Humans Eating Sacred, Omniscient Potatoes
The Onion
5d
5 days ago
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Emmys Producers Warn Aging Stars Deadline For ‘In Memoriam’ Segment Midnight
The Onion
6d
6 days ago
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Sandra Bullock Regrets ‘Practical Magic 2’ After Realizing She Could’ve Just Had Dinner With Nicole Kidman
The Onion
1w
1 week ago
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Trump Promises To Take $5,000 From Every American If Democrats Win Midterm
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1w
1 week ago
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Wired For Performance: The Cutting-Edge Tech Of NFL Uniforms
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1w
1 week ago
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Australia Bans AI Music From Charts
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1w
1 week ago
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25 Years Later, Nation Still Miffed
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1w
1 week ago
1 min read
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What To Know About The 2026 Emmys
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1w
1 week ago
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Savannah Bananas Commemorate 9/11 With Solemn ‘Macarena’ Performance
The Onion
1w
1 week ago
1 min read
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Boning Up
The Onion
1w
1 week ago
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Ella-Lousie Bauer and Aron Howell
The Onion
1w
1 week ago
1 min read
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MLB Attempts To Increase Fan Engagement By Providing Ball With Emotional Backstory
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1w
1 week ago
1 min read
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Woman Sleeps Her Way To Top Of Family
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1w
1 week ago
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Kiss Cam Operator Not Going To Stop Until All 32,000 Fans Have Kissed
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1w
1 week ago
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Bombshell Report Reveals Netanyahu Had Advanced Warning Of Oct. 7 Attacks
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1w
1 week ago
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Stars Share Their Favorite Fall Fashion Secrets
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1w
1 week ago
1 min read
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Hyperrealistic ‘GTA VI’ Feature Makes Players Serve Out Prison Sentences In Real Time
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1w
1 week ago
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Trump Claims 9/11 Attacks Happening Every Day In Democratic Cities
The Onion
1w
1 week ago
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Actions for Trump Claims 9/11 Attacks Happening Every Day In Democratic Cities
The World According to Harp
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1w
1 week ago
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Biggest Revelations From ‘Musk’
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1w
1 week ago
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