What Emotionally Intelligent Couples Misunderstand About Gridlock (opens in new tab)

Some couples arrive with a peculiar kind of exhaustion. Not theatrical exhaustion. Not broken-dishes exhaustion. Educated exhaustion. They have read the books. They have listened to the podcasts. They know their attachment styles, their trauma responses, their nervous system vocabulary, and the approximate location of every childhood wound still operating like an unpaid intern in the marriage. “We understand the pattern,” they say. And they often do. That is the problem. Many emotionally inte...