McSweeney’s

The Art of the Nuclear Deal (opens in new tab)

“Iran deal ends Trump’s war that revealed limit of US dominance.” — BBC - - -Step One: Withdraw from any agreement your predecessor made. A truly great negotiator does not inherit a deal; he wipes the slate clean so he can build one from nothing. Step Two: Bomb them after claiming interest in negotiating. In negotiation, there are no rules, except one: ABB—Always Be Bombing. Step Three: Claim victory. Announce that the nuclear sites have been completely destroyed. Do not worry if your intelli...

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