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- 04 Dec, 2025 *
i. i drop Elliot off at his house after spinning out into a bank during a blizzard. his friend invited us to friendsgiving. i’d been looking forward to it all day - the night before, i picked out this brown mini dress to wear with black heels and tights that i accidentally ripped. my friend told me it was grunge, but in a 2010 grimes sorta way.
but, i’m not wearing the dress. i’m wearing jeans - because …
Home Blog Contact Me Guestbook Subscribe
- 04 Dec, 2025 *
i. i drop Elliot off at his house after spinning out into a bank during a blizzard. his friend invited us to friendsgiving. i’d been looking forward to it all day - the night before, i picked out this brown mini dress to wear with black heels and tights that i accidentally ripped. my friend told me it was grunge, but in a 2010 grimes sorta way.
but, i’m not wearing the dress. i’m wearing jeans - because it had been snowing for the past four hours and the windchill made it feel subzero - and i’m not wearing heels. i’m wearing sneakers. thin, white sneakers. i really need some boots for winter.
i ask Elliot if i can stay at his house for a few minutes. he says yeah, you can. i pet his cat, jimmie. he looks oddly human - like a bald white guy, almost. i should get going.
ii. my brother calls me a bitch at thanksgiving. i throw a drink at him. the next day, he apologizes to me, but somehow still comes off as if he thinks he’s superior to me. i mute his number for the forseeable future.
iii. my mother sends me a picture of my grandparents new dog after she cancels our plans to go see this dog. the breeder lives in dearborn, and my grandmother can’t get there by herself. i’m mad at her - changing our plans last minute to accommodate my grandmother. but i don’t say anything - i have told her i don’t like last minute changes and she still doesn’t listen. it’s not worth it to get into a fight with her.
iv. a few days ago, i texted Elliot an apology for nothing in particular. i delete it later. i keep trying to talk to him, and i tell him that it’s important that we talk about this. he doesn’t listen to me. or he ignores me. i’m not sure. i feel as if i’m going crazy because of this. and his friends keep stalking my tik tok profile, especially after they’ve wronged me. my head starts pounding, and my vision gets blurred by these weird little pixel things. maybe it’s the new medication. i’m dizzy all the time though.
it feels like i’m always cold now, too – my feet are freezing. little icicles are forming off them, hanging off my toes. my feet are never cold in the winter; i’ve started to wear slippers in bed now.
i tell aidan i think i’m losing it.