Imagine this: You walk into your advisor’s office excited about the next step in your project. You start talking about the algorithm refinement you discussed last week, only to see a blank stare. Your advisor then suggests an approach you both dismissed a month ago. Sound familiar?

Your professor isn’t deliberately ignoring your project. They’re juggling twenty items, including other student projects, grant deadlines, administrative duties, and course prep. While you spend your days immersed in your specific research question, they’re constantly switching contexts.

I tell my students: “I’m a deterministic state machine with no memory.” What this means is that without proper input, I’ll reach the same state every time. If my students don’t remind me of our previous discussions, I’ll likely suggest the same things repeatedly. Perhaps this is because I am slowly becoming the stereotype of the preoccupied professor. But it’s also about memory management, and solving it falls to you.

Think of it as Memory Management for your Mentor (MMM). Here’s how to implement it when meeting with your advisor:

• **Before the meeting: **Summarize the project status in your own notes, including last meeting’s decisions, progress, current blockers, and specific questions for this session.
• **During the meeting: **Start with a brief recap. This brief context allows your advisor’s brain to load the right mental model. You’ll get better advice and waste less time.
• **After the meeting: **Document decisions immediately, preferably in a shared document. This serves two purposes: it confirms you understood correctly, and it creates a record for future reference. Your future self will thank you when writing your dissertation.

This approach benefits everyone: Your advisor gives better guidance, you make faster progress, and the relationship becomes more productive.

Obviously, this skill transfers directly to other mentor/mentee relationships, including managers in industry and senior faculty members once you become faculty yourself. Showing up prepared with context saves everyone time.

So remember: your advisor cares about your success, but their mental bandwidth has limits. Help them help you by managing their memory yourself.