*Families in the U.S. and around the world are having fewer children as people make profoundly different decisions about their lives. NPR’s series *Population Shift: How Smaller Families Are Changing the World explores the causes and implications of this trend.

SALT LAKE CITY — When you think of big families, one of your first thoughts might be members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, commonly called Mormons. In the early 1980s, they were having an extra kid and a half compared to the rest of the U.S. on average. Latter-day Saints still have more children, but their families are shrinking.

The church’s top leader addressed declining U.S. birth rates during the faith’s semiannual General Conference in October, which millions of members tune in to from around the world. (There are more than 17.5 million Latter-day Saints globally, according to the church.)

Dallin H. Oaks, the newly appointed prophet and president of the church, said that while birth rates within the church are higher than national numbers, they’ve still declined “significantly.”

“It is vital that Latter-day Saints do not lose their understanding of the purpose of marriage and the value of children. That is the future for which we strive,”** **he said. “Our relationship to God and the purpose of our mortal life are explained in terms of the family.

In Latter-day Saint theology, people live as spirits in a pre-mortal world. Being born on Earth is how humans get a body and learn and grow. They also believe it’s a commandment from God for people to “multiply and replenish the Earth.”

Bishop Steve Eror oversees a congregation in Salt Lake City, where the church has its headquarters. He said the number of kids in his charge has been going down, and he mourns the loss, partly because he thinks children and adults have a lot to learn from each other. Eror says the church’s focus on kids has to do with their belief in eternal families — that families can be together forever.

But he worries about there being enough kids in his congregation to support each other.

“Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is not easy,” he said. “There is a real benefit for having that community where, you know, you’re living the same standards and you have similar beliefs, and you’re strengthening each other.”

The church’s senior leadership didn’t grant NPR’s request for an interview or comment.

Catholic University of America demographer Stephen Cranney crunched the numbers on the religion’s families. In 2008, about 70% of Latter-day Saint women ages 18-45 had at least one child at home. In 2022, that number was 59%, a rate of decline mirrored in the American population at large.

Eror said they have to adapt to this new reality — his congregation’s youth and kid’s church classes didn’t have enough students, leading them to partner with another congregation.

“I don’t think I could have juggled more”

On a recent Sunday afternoon, children wiggled in their seats as they sang, “Every star is different, and so is every child.”

Ryan and Missy Allen’s two kids were among the singers. After church was over, their kids ran around in the foyer as the Allens talked about how they once wanted three, but didn’t think they could make it work because they can’t afford a bigger place to live.

“But also, I don’t think I could have juggled at least one more because I’m losing my mind with two,” Missy laughed.

They both work — she’s a photographer and he’s an electrician — but Utah has one of the most expensive housing markets in the country. Even with the tough economic reality, they prayed about their decision. Ryan said they eventually felt at peace with two children. But Missy said that if they had felt it was right to have a third kid, “We would have just done it and held our breath and really hoped that God would provide.”

Eror would have counseled them to take that leap of faith if that’s where inspiration led them, despite the financial uncertainty.

“The Lord provides a way to step up and take on the roles that he needs us to take on,” he said. “I’ve never gone wrong trusting my Heavenly Father.”

**“We can, but we’re not” **

Spencer James is a Brigham Young University family life professor and a church member. He said the Allens aren’t alone; Latter-day Saints aren’t immune to the things that affect other Americans, like rising housing prices and expensive child care. But he doesn’t think smaller families will lead to an identity crisis for the faith.

“I do think that it could lead to some questioning of, how do we reorganize society in a way that values children, that values families in better ways than we currently have.”

In addition to expenses,** **James said lower birth rates could also be a result of a lack of community support.

**“**Right now, I think in many ways, potential parents feel like raising this child is all on me,” he said. “And the community that used to exist still likes the *idea *of me having children, but they’re not there for me in the same way.”

That’s partly why Gregory and Anna Gabbott chose to stop with their two girls, who like to tickle each other and play with Star Wars toys at their home in Bountiful, Utah.

The Gabbotts wish there had been more affordable support for them after birth; Anna had postpartum depression after their first, and both of their children had trouble sleeping as babies.

Church members sometimes ask them if they’ll have more, so the Gabbotts feel some pressure and expectation. But Anna says it’s a good reminder to be less judgmental of others.

“Whether it’s like tattoos or like anything else, it’s like, well, I can’t judge them for that if I don’t want them judging me,” she said. “And so I feel like it hopefully helps me be a little bit kinder as a Christian.”

Anna believes there are more ways she can follow the commandment to multiply and replenish the Earth, like raising plants or creating art. She also believes the cultural pressure among Latter-day Saints to have lots of kids is slowing and shifting toward individual relationships with God.

But even though the Gabbotts believe God is good with their decision, they feel a little guilty.

“There is that kind of feeling like, oh man, like, there are people out there who want more kids and who are trying to have more kids, but they can’t. And …” Gregory trailed off in thought.

Anna chimed in: “We can, but we’re not.”

“Does that make us bad people?” Gregory wondered out loud with a chuckle.

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Transcript

A MARTÍNEZ, HOST:

This week, NPR is exploring declining birth rates in the U.S. and other countries as part of our series Population Shift. Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, commonly called Mormons, are often associated with big families, but those families are shrinking. KUER’s Ciara Hulet looked into what it means for a faith focused on family.

CIARA HULET, BYLINE: Every October, millions of faithful Latter-day Saints around the world tune into a conference for spiritual guidance. The faith’s top leaders said this year that while birth rates in the church are better than the national numbers, they’ve still gone down significantly.

(SOUNDBITE OF ARCHIVED RECORDING)

DALLIN H OAKS: It is vital that Latter-day Saints do not lose their understanding of the purpose of marriage and the value of children.

HULET: Dallin H. Oaks is now the church’s prophet and president.

(SOUNDBITE OF ARCHIVED RECORDING)

OAKS: Our relationship to God and the purpose of our mortal life are explained in terms of the family.

HULET: The LDS Church is widely known as the Mormon Church. In their theology, all people live as spirits in a premortal world, and being born on Earth is how we get a body and learn and grow. It’s also a commandment from God to multiply and replenish the Earth. Bishop Steve Eror in Salt Lake City believes the focus on children also has to do with their belief in eternal families.

STEVE EROR: The families just aren’t here for this life, but are going to be together forever.

HULET: Catholic University of America demographer Stephen Cranney crunched the numbers. In 2008, about 70% of Latter-day Saint women 18 to 45 had at least one child at home. In 2022, that number was 60%. Women not part of the faith with the children at home declined at about the same rate. Bishop Eror worries about there being enough kids in his congregation to support each other.

EROR: Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is not easy. There is a real benefit for having that community where, you know, you’re living the same standards and you have similar beliefs and you’re strengthening each other.

HULET: The church didn’t grant NPR’s request for an interview or comment. Eror says his congregation had to combine with another for youth and kids church classes so there would be enough children.

(SOUNDBITE OF ARCHIVED RECORDING)

UNIDENTIFIED PERSON: All right, here we go.

UNIDENTIFIED CHILDREN: (Singing) Every star is different, and so is every child.

HULET: It’s a Sunday afternoon, and about 25 kids wiggle in their seats as they sing. Ryan (ph) and Missy Allen’s (ph) two kids are among the singers. After church is over, their kids run around in the foyer, and the Allens talk about how they originally wanted three, but they didn’t think they could make it work because they can’t afford a bigger place to live.

MISSY ALLEN: But also I don’t think I could have juggled at least one more ’cause I’m losing my mind with two (laughter).

HULET: They both work, but Utah now has one of the most expensive housing markets in the country. Even with that economic reality, they prayed about their decision.

RYAN ALLEN: And we just kind of felt at peace with two.

M ALLEN: Yeah.

R ALLEN: I’m like, OK, God, you decided it.

M ALLEN: Yeah. If we had felt like it was right to have a third kid, we would have just done it and held our breath and really hoped that God would provide.

HULET: Spencer James is a Brigham Young University family life professor and a church member. He says the Allens aren’t alone. Latter-day Saints aren’t immune to the things that affect other Americans, like housing prices and expensive child care.

SPENCER JAMES: Right now, I think, in many ways, potential parents feel like raising this child is all on me, and the community that used to exist still likes the idea of me having children, but they’re not there for me in the same way.

UNIDENTIFIED CHILD #1: (Laughing).

HULET: That’s partly why Gregory (ph) and Anna Gabbott (ph) chose to stop with their two girls, who are tickling each other and playing with Star Wars toys in Bountiful, Utah.

UNIDENTIFIED CHILD #2: Use staffs.

GREGORY GABBOTT: Oh, yeah. You need a staff.

HULET: Church members sometimes ask if they’ll have more, so the Gabbotts feel some pressure and expectation. But Anna says it’s a good reminder for her to be less judgmental of others.

ANNA GABBOTT: Whether it’s, like, tattoos or anything else, it’s like, well, I can’t judge them for that, if I don’t want them judging me for the number of children that I have. And so I feel like it hopefully helps me be a little bit kinder as a Christian.

HULET: And she believes there are more ways she can follow the commandment to multiply and replenish the Earth, like raising plants. But even though the Gabbotts believe God is good with their decision, they still feel a little guilty.

G GABBOTT: There is that kind of feeling like, oh, man, like, there are people out there who want more kids and who are trying to have more kids, but they can’t.

A GABBOTT: And we can, but we’re not.

G GABBOTT: But we’re not.

A GABBOTT: (Laughter).

G GABBOTT: So does that make us bad people (laughter)?

HULET: But Anna believes the cultural pressure in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to have a lot of kids is slowly shifting toward individual relationships with God.

For NPR News, I’m Ciara Hulet in Salt Lake City, Utah.

(SOUNDBITE OF BUNN NOGUCHI’S “PLATEAU”)