Television is a lot like the weather, don’t you think? We’re always complaining about it, but never do anything about it. And when someone *does *try to change it—by improving its quality, for example—people don’t watch it, and then go back to complaining. (Which makes it a lot like social media too, come to think of it.) And such is the case, as we find out this week from Dwight Whitney, with a program called, Slattery’s People.

Slattery’s People, starring Richard Crenna, was one of CBS’s prestige dramas, created by James Moser, the man responsible for *Medic *and Ben Casey. Moser approached the network and its then-president, James Aubrey, with the idea of a show about “a young, Kennedy-like politician, along the lines of Casey, with the capitol dome substituting for the operating room.” It had been turned down by ABC, “on the grounds that political shows were never really successful.” This apparently acted as something of an aphrodisiac for Aubury, who wanted to show that he “knew better.” He bit on Moser’s idea.

The problems came early and often, beginning with Aubrey’s insistence that the lead role go to Crenna, who until then had been known primarily for two long-running series: Our Miss Brooks, in which he portrayed perennial teenager Walter Denton, and The Real McCoys, in which he played the good-natured Luke McCoy to Walter Brennan’s patriarch Amos. Crenna himself had once said that he couldn’t “compete with those good-looking former gas-station attendants who become stars overnight,” and alarm bells sounded for Moser and the team at Bing Crosby Productions, who preferred someone stronger, more charismatic—someone, in fact, like Vince Edwards, star of Casey. But, as Moser points out, “When the head man wants it that bad—well, you are hardly in a position to argue.”

Almost as soon as the pilot for *Slattery *was shot, Aubrey began second-guessing himself. He thought the pilot was “great,” and liked the idea of a serious dramatic program to counteract the accusations that he was lowering the Tiffany Network’s standards, but he also wanted the show to “get out from under the capitol dome more.” Says one insider, “It was that well-known Aubrey ambivalence. He wanted it but he didn’t. We didn’t know which side of Aubrey we were fighting, the literary Jim Aubrey or the merely commercial one.” Moser, more blunt about it, said “What he was really saying was: Let’s make this into a political adventure show.”

Slattery *debuted that fall to critical praise, but ratings disaster, as it was slaughtered by its opposition: Ben Casey, irony of ironies. There was talk of replacing Crenna with someone stronger; the actor complained that “Everybody was looking for a whipping boy to salve their injured egos. I was a natural selection. I wasn’t ready to buy that.” Aubury decided the show needed more women in the supporting cast to make it more “popular,” and that Crenna’s character needed to be “humanized.” It was, according to Whitney, “a kind of Terry and the Politicians.” Aubury also moved the show from Mondays to Fridays, where it would go up against *The Man from U.N.C.L.E. *Everyone, Crenna included, assumed it would be canceled at the end of the season, and it was. A week after that, Aubury was himself canceled by William Paley, and *Slattery *found itself with a second life, thanks to Michael Dann, the network’s VP in charge of programming. Dann put the show back on the fall schedule, declaring to the media that “Although the series has never been in the Top 10, we believe this hour.of meaningful drama has a place on our schedule next fall.”

“Back at the studio,” Moser had already started a new project. A new producer, Irving Elman, was called in. Slattery began to loosen his tie, both literally and figuratively. He was referred to, for the first time on camera, by his first hame. A love interest was introduced. And, after the second episode of the shows’s second season, it was canceled again. The show’s ratings were worse than ever (if two episods can be considered statistically significant; “*Slattery *was not even getting a sampling,” and as someone pointed out, if you can’t get people to sample a show, you’re in big trouble. *Slattery’s People *would be replaced in the timeslot by another struggling drama, Trials of O’Brien, which would meet a similar fate before too long.

Although praising the show, Dann points out, not unreasonably, that “there are certain minimum requirements. This year Slattery was our lowest-rated drama.” “I know what the rules are,” Crenna said, looking back at it from the perspective of a man who’s been around the business. “During the years we were doing The Real McCoys, we knocked off 19 shows, among them Playhouse 90.” That doesn’t mean he has to like it, though, or that he thinks it’s right. “I don’t ask for any miracles. The real shame is that the medium can’t make room for a Playhouse 90. Just the same I am going to miss Slattery’s People.” It is, it would seem, the eternal conundrum: people complain about the lack of quality television, but when you give it to them, they don’t watch.

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During the 60s, the Ed Sullivan Show and The Hollywood Palace were the premier variety shows on television. Whenever they appear in TV Guide together, we’ll match them up and see who has the best lineup.. ** ****Sullivan: **Ed’s scheduled guests are comics Woody Allen and Bert Lahr; the rock ‘n’ rolling Dave Clark Five; singer Jerry Vale; the singing Barry Sisters; and the winners of the Harvest Moon Ball dance contest. (Other sources confirm this lineup as listed.)

**Palace: **The hostess is Judy Garland, who dons her tramp costume for two numbers and recalls songs made famous by singers at the original Palace on Broadway. Also on the bill: singer Vic Damone, dancer Chita Rivera, comedian Gene Baylos, the comedy team of Avery Schreiber and Jack Burns, the acrobatic Lyons Family and the Three Bragazzi, musical clowns from Italy.

There’s nothing wrong with Ed’s lineup this week; Woody Allen could be very funny as a standup, the Dave Clark Five are at their peak, and Jerry Vale is as smooth as ever. On the other hand, though, you’ve got Judy Garland hosting the Palace, and she proves she can still put on quite a show when she gets a venue such as this. Chita Rivera is as exciting a dancer as there is around, and there’s nothing wrong with Vic Damone’s voice, either. This week, **Garland takes the Palace over the rainbow for the win.

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From 1963 to 1976, TV Guide’s weekly reviews were written by the witty and acerbic Cleveland Amory. Whenever they appear, we’ll look at Cleve’s latest take on the shows of the era*. *

It’s difficult to think of Steve Lawrence without also thinking of his wife, Eydie Gorme: they started out together on Steve Allen’s Tonight, and “Steve and Eydie” is how we think of them, even though whenever they appeared with Johnny Carson, for example, they famously appeared on separate nights, so that one of them would always be home with their children. And Steve Lawrence did, in fact, build up a considerable list of solo credits, including many appearances on The Carol Burnett Show. You might have forgotten that, for a short time, he was even host of his own weekly variety show, The Steve Lawrence Show, and if you have forgotten such fact, according to Cleveland Amory, it’s your loss.

The Lawrence show (at the time, he was considered a protege of Jackie Gleason, whose company produced Lawrence’s effort) is by no means perfect. It falls victim to so many of the cliches and unimaginative tropes of so many variety shows of the day: the congratulatory “telegrams” from celebrities that turn out to be extended jokes (“You sang better than I ever did’ and it’s signed ‘Dean .. . and Mrs. Rusk”), the grand entrances of guests such as Lucille Ball (who complained that Lawrence introduced her as “the first lady of TV”; “I’m not. The first lady of television was Milton Berle.”), and so on. Cleve cites an example from the show’s premiere, when Steve and Lucy rode through Shubert Alley atop an elephant, which at one point chose to dump the pair into the startled arms of spectators. When highlights of the procession made it on air, it was sans such unplanned mishap, “which illustrates not only how little imagination producers of a taped show have when, once in a blue moon, something happens which actually would be interesting, but also how you are being shortchanged by the ‘miracle’ of tape.”

If this sounds harsh, it’s only because the show is capable of so much more. Notes Amory, “Mr. Lawrence himself has some strong pluses, not only as a singer but also a host. He doesn’t, like so many other hosts, come on as if he thought he was the greatest man since Adam and he doesn’t try to hit you over the head with (a) his charm (b) his wit or (c) his voice.” When he quietly sings songs such as “You’ll Never Know” or “I Really Don’t Want to Know,” “he can be extraordinarily ingratiating.” One show, a country-music salute to Nashville, was, as Amory put it, “excellent.” It helps make up for the time when Bobby Darin sang “Get Me to the Church on Time” “as if he had just misplaced the tune and lost the address of the lyricist.” In all, it seems as if Lawrence, like so many past stars (see: Garland, Judy) was done wrong by his producers and directors; when the show does conclude its run, after 13 weeks, it’s with Eydie joining him on stage, and I’ll wager the two of them singing was all the show ever needed.

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When it was released in 1958, Alfred Hitchcock’s *Vertigo *was considered fun and exciting, but “too long and slow” to ever be considered among the master’s best. Today, it’s not only ranked as his best, it’s considered by most critics to be one of the greatest movies of all time. Personally, I think that’s a little much; I mean, it’s good, but I never did quite see what all the shouting was about. Nonetheless, it makes its network television debut on NBC’s ***Saturday **Night at the Movies *(9:00 p.m.), earning the coveted “time extension” slot that permits it to run a half-hour longer than the average Saturday night movie, concluding at 11:30 p.m. And, whether you think it’s great or mearly good, it’s a pretty nice way to spend a Saturday evening.

On Sunday, Danger Man’s John Drake, Patrick McGoohan, stars in part one of a three-part presentation of Walt Disney’s charming 1963 story of a girl and her cat, The Three Lives of Thomasina, on *The Wonderful World of Color *(7:30 p.m., NBC). And for something slightly different, I recommend staying up late to see KHSL’s late movie, *The Killers *(11:15 p.m.), a terrific adaptation of Ernest Hemingway’s short story, starring Burt Lancaster, Ava Gardner, and Edmund O’Brien. As you probably know, it was remade in 1964, starring Lee Marvin, Ronald Reagan (his last film role), and Angie Dickinson; I actually prefer the remake, but the original is pretty damn good.

False jeopardy notice: on Monday’s episode of *Run for Your Life *(10:00 p.m., NBC), “Motor trouble forces Paul to stop in Pine Grove, where he gets into a fight with town boss Loomis’s son Neddie—who is later found murdered.” As you know, this is one of the TV tropes I absolutely despise, and there are actually *two *for the price of one in this story: not only is Paul (Ben Gazzara) put in false jeopardy—I mean, you and I both know the star of the show isn’t going to be written out by being convicted of murder, so everything that follows depends on how well the search for the real killer goes—it also happens in an unhospitable small town run by a tyrannical local citizen, which, as we all know, is the *only *kind of small town that exists. You’re better off turning to the aforementioned *Steve Lawrence Show *(10:00 p.m., CBS), with Steve’s guests, Trini Lopez, Caterina Valente, and Judi Rolin.

I think Tuesday‘s episode of *Combat! *(7:30 p.m., ABC) raises some interesting points we don’t often think about in World War II dramas: Saunders’ squad replacements include three privates nearing 40: one is homesick for his family, another is a limping veteran, and the third a former politician looking for a resume padder. Saunders is exasperated, as are the other members of the squad, and here’s my point: as troops continue to fall and are replaced, there must have come a time when the GIs started to wonder just how many men were left back in the States, and whether or not they might actually be running out of them. It’s seen even more strongly a few episodes later, when they encounter German soldiers who are little more than schoolchildren; they are, in fact, all the Germans have left to offer. The whole thing is frightening when you stop to consider it.

Later on Tuesday, a *CBS News Special *(10:00 p.m.) takes a backstage look at Frank Sinatra, in a special that’s created controversy before it’s even aired. As Henry Harding reports, Sinatra was displeased with questions about his personal life asked by host Walter Cronkite, questions which Sinatra “politely, but firmly,” refused to answer. Shortly thereafter, CBS News received a letter from Sinatra’s lawyer “withdrawing permission to use film footage in which he appeared.” Says one of his press agents, “Consent was originally granted when Sinatra was led to believe that the program would be a commentary on his career as an entertainer in the same manner in which the network did news specials on the careers of Pablo Casals, Isaac Stern and Marian Anderson.” CBS counters that the special is a *news *presentation, not an entertainment special, and doesn’t require any permission to air the footage. The documentary does air, and apparently the aftereffects aren’t too lasting; his Emmy-nominated 1969 special runs on CBS. Andy Rooney, by the way, wrote the script for tonight’s show.

Bob Hope plays a thinly disguised version of himself in the Chrysler Theatre presentation “Russian Roulette” (Wednesday, 9:00 p.m., NBC). It seems that comedian Les Haines (Hope), on his way to Russia as part of a cultural exchange group, gets mixed up with espionage and a glamorous secret agent, played by Jill St. John. Don Rickles, Victor Buono, Harold J. Stone, and Leon Askin round out a terrific supporting cast; Bing Crosby, alas, is nowhere to be seen. Hope co-authored the story on which the script is based. If you want your totalitarian stories without comedy, tune in for KSHL’s late movie (boy, they’ve got a good lineup this week), the 1956 British adaptation of 1984, starring Michael Redgrave and Edmond O’Brien. (11:30 p.m.)

The circus is coming to town on Thursday, as Ed Wynn and his three granddaughters host a rare performance of the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus, taped in Seattle. (7:30 p.m., NBC) At 9:00 p.m., it’s the excellent crime thriller *Experiment in Terror *(CBS), starring Glenn Ford, Lee Remick, and Stefanie Powers in the story of a woman being forced by a criminal to embezzle from her bank employer. If she doesn’t agree, her sister dies. And in the night’s highlight, the *Hallmark Hall of Fame *is back with Melvyn Douglas and Ed Begley in “Inherit the Wind” (9:30 p.m., NBC) the dramatization of the Scopes monkey trial of 1925. You can insert my obligatory complaint about the diminished quality of Hallmark television presentations here.

**Friday **night, it’s the return of the marvelous Michael Dunn as Dr. Loveless on *The Wild Wild West *(7:30 p.m., CBS), and this time he’s accompanied by Richard Kiel as Voltaire. It doesn’t get much better than that, does it? There’s some primetime sports on tap, as KTVU has San Francisco Warriors basketball; tonight, the Warriors, let by Rick Barry and Nate Thurmond, take on Jerry West, Elgin Baylor, and the Los Angeles Lakers, live from Los Angeles. (8:30 p.m.) And much later, on the unfortunate final season of *The Farmer’s Daughter *(9:30 p.m., ABC), Glen and Kate find trouble on their honeymoon when their hotel is besieged by a rock star trying to escape his fans; Judy Carne is among the costars.

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Now, you didn’t think we’d forget that Joey Heatherton is on the cover of this week’s issue, did you? Of course not; don’t be ridiculous. In fact, we’d be rather shirking our duties as a cultural archaeologist to overlook the inside spread, in which we get not only a look at the progress of Joey’s career, but at some of the threads she’s modeling, courtesy of such designers as Carl, Golo, and Capezio.

Twenty-one-year-old Davenie Johanna Heatherton, the article tells us, is “the archetypal ‘pop culture’ chickie, and that’s all there is to it: lithe, white-blonde, kinetic, shapely and young—permanently young.” As far as being the arbiter of cultural style, “If there’s a rhythm and flavor to these particular years in the United States, she’s in touch with it.” She’s acted in various television series—Mr. Novak, The Virginian, The Nurses, Breaking Point—but it’s the dancing, whether she’s doing the Frug, the Watusi, the Jerk, the Chicken, the Pony, the Boston, the Monkey, the Philadelphia—*that’s *what stays in the imagination, long after the other young, blonde actresses have come and gone. “It’s an outlet,” she says of pop rock dance. “We’re working out our problems. You get a bad mark in school, you come home, turn on the radio, and let it out.”

She was a sensation last summer, when she joined Bob Hope’s company touring the Dominican Republic entertaining the troops, and she’ll be going with him this December to Vietnam. She still remembers the reaction from those young soldiers: “I just walked out on the stage and they went ape. I wore, you know, a leotard and boots. They were all so googly-eyed. I sang the lines, ‘Im just a little girl who’s looking for a little boy,’ and some of them started running up on the stage. The MP’s had to head them off.” Expect a similar reaction in Vietnam.

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MST3K alert: It Conquered the World *(1956) Scientists discover that an outer-space monster has arrived from Venus to destroy Earth. Peter Graves, Lee Van Cleef, Beverly Garland. (Saturday, 5:30 p.m., KCRA) “He learned almost too late that man is a feeling creature. . . and, because of it, the greatest in the universe. He learned too late for himself that men have to find their own way, to make their own mistakes. There can’t be any gift of perfection from outside ourselves. And when men seek such perfection. . . they find only death. . . fire. . . loss. . . disillusionment. . . the end of everything that’s gone forward. Men have always sought an end to the toil and misery, but it can’t be given, it has to be achieved. There is hope, but it has to come from inside—from man himself.” TV

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