My first kleptomania patient
newstatesman.com·1d
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Illustration by Charlotte Trounce

Theo wanted me to sign him off sick. “I’ve had this at various times in my life,” he explained. “I just can’t help myself – it’s an overwhelming urge to steal.” His eyes had a beseeching look. “But it’s serious now: these days I’m working in care.”

I will admit to initial scepticism – people in trouble sometimes attempt to recruit doctors to aid their defence. But Theo hadn’t been caught. It would end his career, though, were he to be found stealing from vulnerable adults in his care.

“I’ve taken myself out of work.” He shook his head vigorously. “It’s so stupid – I don’t even want the things. I don’t need them. I honestly don’t know why I do it.”

Kleptomania is…

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