Our 19-year-old son died in July after a long illness. The last years of his life were very difficult as we tried to support him while keeping life as normal as possible for our other children.

Amid the stress, we were late with two repayments on our mortgage with Metro Bank in February and March. Since April we have been fully up to date.

Recently our application to remortgage our house with Nationwide was refused because Metro had placed late payment markers on our credit file.

**We explained the circumstances in August and, given our previous good repayment history, asked ****it to remove the markers as a goodwill gesture. ****It refused. This is causing extreme stress to us as we rebuild from our loss. **Name and address supplied

Your family has suffered unimaginable anguish. Your son died in hospital and you are awaiting an inquest to determine the cause. During the pandemic, the then 14-year-old had suffered an acute mental breakdown.

Over the next five years he was repeatedly sectioned, hospitalised and housed in secure children’s homes 60 miles from where you live. For two years, you had to manage his care at home until it became impossible to keep him and your other children safe. His final nine months were spent in supported accommodation and you made the 120 mile round trip to visit him several times a week.

It is at this point that you twice fell behind with your repayments. Credit reports have to reflect missed payments or defaults so that lenders can make informed decisions on whether an applicant can afford the deal they are requesting.

However, according to the credit rating agency Experian, lenders can choose to amend files in exceptional circumstances. Your circumstances certainly count as exceptional, so I asked Metro if it could remove the markers.

This time it agreed. It told me that if it had been aware of your ordeal at the time the payments were missed it would have made allowances.

“We understand not all customers want to talk to their bank about personal circumstances,” said a spokesperson. “However, for individuals facing financial challenges, we’d advise speaking to us as early as possible to discuss support options available.”

Nationwide told me that it too had been unaware of the mitigating circumstances and promised to review your application. Unfortunately, this resulted in a second refusal because the bank statements you submitted suggest you would struggle to repay the loan.

You say the cost of your son’s funeral temporarily depleted your balance. I suggest you wait until your finances have recovered, then make a new mortgage application as multiple applications in a short space of time can damage your credit score. In the meantime I wish you and your family well as you navigate a future without your son.

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