Relocating for a new job was never a big deal. Having kids changed things; we’re not moving now, even for a big opportunity.

Essay by

The author and her husband decided to put down roots once they had children. Courtesy of Candy Mickels Mejia

2025-12-12T18:09:01.245Z

• Relocating for work was exciting when my husband and I were newly married.
• Having children shifted our priorities, leading us to choose stability over new opportunities.
• We decided that giving our children roots was more important than living in new cities or countries.

By our fifth wedding anniversary, my husband and I had moved twice for his job. We were in our 20s and excited for new experiences. It was easy to embrace the chaos of moving then.

When a third opportunity to relocate was presented, the choice wasn’t so easy anymore. Our family had grown; we now had a baby to consider. This move would take us from Houston to California, a place we’d barely visited. The whole idea felt exciting, but what would it be like to move halfway across the country with a baby in tow?

Having a baby made us think differently about moving

We asked ourselves what advice we’d give our child if she were an adult making this decision. We realized we’d encourage her to take the chance, so we decided we would, too.

My husband’s employer provided us with a moving company to pack, load, and transport our belongings. Unfortunately, the truck had a blowout on I-10 and was delayed, so when we arrived in California, we were without many of the comforts that make life with a baby easier for longer than we’d planned.

The beginning was rough, but it worked out. We embraced having mountains and beaches close by, but what we couldn’t embrace was the cost of living. To afford to live where we were, I’d need to go back to work. However, we’d created a little obstacle; I was pregnant. We didn’t know if we could afford to live in California with our expanding family, but we knew of a place we could afford.


The author worried that moving with young children could be difficult. Courtesy of Candy Mickels Mejia

When our family changed, our reason to move changed

Two and a half years after we arrived in California, we were on the move again. This relocation took us back to Houston. Thankfully, my husband’s company provided moving assistance once more.

Moving while pregnant and with a 3-year-old was exhausting, but we settled into our new house and our new life. Once we hit the milestone of two and a half years in our home, we celebrated.

A few months later, my husband was asked to consider applying for another opportunity. The position was outside the United States, and if he applied, it would mean we were OK with moving abroad. But were we?

For our move to California, we’d asked ourselves what advice we’d give our children. Now the question was: what life did we want to give our children?

We decided to give our children roots instead of adventures

Despite the benefits and experiences that come with living as expatriates, providing our children with stable and predictable childhoods was a bigger priority for us. We chose to have our adventures during school vacations instead of having an adventure-based life.

My husband did not apply for that overseas position and chose not to apply to any other jobs that would require us to relocate. We’ve now been in our second Houston house for 16 years. Moving was fun for a while, but we’re thankful we were able to stay in one place after the fun wore off.

And if our children ever ask us for advice on moving, will we stick with our original, hypothetical answer? I think we would.

• Essay
• Family
• Parenting
• More

Read next